How many times to we go to describe our children to someone and fill the air with a list of labels?
…she’s independent…stubborn…loves animals…hates broccoli…snippy…free spirit
What’s the danger in this? Why would I ever bring the word danger into this harmless act?
Well, let’s say that Laney comes to me 20 years from now and says, “Mom, I don’t know why I have thought all these years that I was stubborn?…but, I want to be more open and learn when things are presented to me, not when I ‘want’ to.” Or “Mom, I just discovered that I LOVE broccoli!” The healthy response would be…That is incredible and you should be incredibly proud of the changes you are making…I want to hear all about it so I can explore with you.” The dangerous response, “That doesn’t sound like you at all, what’s going on with you?” It is proven that what is said TO children is less influential than what is said ABOUT them. So we should take extra caution with the labels that we are putting on our kids and the message of not wanting them to change, because one day, those labels might not work for them anymore;)
Jalena…I am so proud of the person that you are. You are such a beautiful part of my everyday! I am so excited for what the future holds for you because I know that you are a dreamer (great label to have;) and you will make your dreams come true. I vow to continue to hit the REFRESH button towards you and who you are or want to be. I want our family to be your safe place to be anyone you want to be and try out new ideas with. I know you are going to have an amazing life because you are nothing short of amazing in our eyes. You have a lot of fans in this house and we think you are the bees knees;) Let’s continue to teach and support one another….I SEE YOU!!!
O.K. one label that isn’t a label, but more of a fact right now in your life….you are big. And by big I mean that, you’re tall. Beyond the obvious that may not be your truth forever….Your dreams are big. The ray of sunshine that you give off through your smile is big. And your future is big. You are also a big deal in my eyes. Here’s my big girl with one of her BFF’s in 1st grade. She has the same size feet as Tré and I think they are only a couple inches apart;) My girl has gotten so big, and I think I will be smaller than her before long.
Speaking of BIG…here is a picture that I know is going to be a BIG deal in your life. I know it is proven that girls tend to perform for their father-figures throughout their life. I believe Freud did a lot of studies on this subject, and I am sure he would have loved to have witnessed this beautiful father-daughter dance. I think that you have one of the most amazing Dad’s on this planet and I know that you are going to pull so much strength from this amazing father-daughter love story. All we can do is fill you up with as much love as we can, throw a few tools your way, and watch you grow into the person that you’re meant to be! We love you Lu!